I have always been an athlete, I grew up swimming, playing softball, golfing, cheerleading, running, biking, and the list continues. So consider it sold if you dangle a sport in my face. I was in. And my competitive drive would take me above and beyond.
But ten years ago, I woke up in a hospital room with medical professionals telling me that walking was not in the cards – or this was what I heard (even though the words spewed were not promising that I would walk again). If I returned to the real world and could live independently, this would be fantastic, as most with my traumatic brain injury – not like one is a like – do not return to the corporate world, the driving world, the independent world, and the list continues. But hearing these words and internalizing them in every aspect of my being, I wanted to test the waters to see what I could be – what was I capable of? So, I began pushing myself harder in every therapy session with every movement I made. I even dreamt of my body moving in ways that were deemed impossible, and I would feel the sensation of the steps being taken forward – when I could not even stand. I had goals and knew I had the inner drive and Moxy. The world was my playground; what was I going to create?
So, it started out re-learning how to walk. But when I hit this goal, I wanted more. Ironically, something inside was telling me that I was made for more. I already knew nothing could be worse than what I woke up from – coma and paralysis land. So, I might as well see my limits and boundaries and help my TBI family by raising awareness of our hidden disability.
Several years went by, and I continued to see what my boundaries were regarding endurance athletics. But, then, Yurlp, I couldn’t choose just one sport; I wanted them all, meaning triathlon was the only way forward.
At this time, I had dropped foot so badly. I questioned daily how someone could go from running fast – like sub-7-ish-minute miles for a 10K combat the same body as someone running sub-10-minute miles. I did not understand (maybe it was the paralysis and coma thing – kidding). I was honored to run and take the first step, balanced, guided, and stepping alone. This was my WHY and the mission behind my purpose. I felt confident that even with my small obstacles, like drop foot, these would be overlooked with my WHY.
As an athlete, the mentality to push limits and boundaries was engraved in my blood vessels. This was with everything: athletics, employment, relationships, etc. But somewhere along the lines, when COVID hit, I became complacent and, in some ways, co-dependent – which were not the qualities I sought.
It took a couple of years and a unique friendship that helped me understand life from a different lens. From experiences, instead of committing to everything outside my control, I took a significant step inward to focus on what I had control over.
This led me to sign up for every endurance race under the stars that grabbed my attention. I no longer raced for me; I raced for those who did not have the opportunity to take their first steps. I run for TBI-ers, inspire other survivors to continue pushing forward, and run for my trauma-fed body that is ongoing through healing.
This year’s Race Schedule 23′:
Desert Rat’s (50K to gain tokens to enter the UTMB lottery for 2024),
Quad Rock (25-mile with 5K -6K vertical gain),
Great Divide (100 K with 10, 000 + vertical gain),
Mt. Evans Accent (undecided if it will be 14 or 20 + miles up a 14-er in the high country),
Triple By-Pass (118 miles bike with 12, 500 vertical gain),
Never Summer (60K with 8,500 + vertical gain),
Ironman Madison (2.4-mile swim, 112-mile bike, 26.2-mile run),
Yipee Ki Yee (50K 3, 000 vertical gain-ish).
And a few races in between where I am course sweeping and helping with maintenance. I run to find healing, comfort, and self-love and to raise awareness of hidden disabilities. To focus on traumatic brain injuries (TBI) since I am a survivor.
Saturday, I tackle one of the largest races of the season—the Great Divide 100K. Here I will step on the start line not as Molly Cain, but SMILE #UWokeUp – as this is my WHY for existence.
If you are a survivor and are in the process of finding your gait and balance again toward taking your first steps, or if you are a survivor who can take steps forward and are ready to talk walking/running further. I encourage you to apply for @smileuwokeup shoe application on our website: smileuwokeup.org.
#endurance #athletics #coma #paralyzed #tbi #braininjury #overcomer #goals #100K #50K #ultramarathon #60k #triplebypass #ironmanwisonsin